Remembering mother and baby home survivor Tony Kelly

REST in peace - that common term we all use for those who have passed.

After a life of battling the State that failed him as a child, the late Tony Kelly is, one hopes, sleeping peacefully.

Tony was a survivor of the Irish mother and baby home system and was a high-profile campaigner for other survivors. He was articulate and compassionate and he was a voice for many who had no voice.

He spent 30 years fighting the various State and religious agencies for answers to questions about his own life. Nothing too complicated. He just wanted to know who he was and where he came from.

Tony was a regular visitor to Mayo from his Dublin home. His connections with the Swinford area stemmed from him having been fostered there as a child after a number of years in various care settings. He attended Cashel National School.

Tony had many friends in the east Mayo area and travelled down to the county every year to catch up.

The last time we met was a year ago when he came to Swinford for a neighbour's funeral. That was Tony. He never forgot people's kindness.

On that occasion he had recently discovered that he hadn't been fostered but had actually been adopted. Papers showed his adoption was illegal.

We had a lengthy chat that day - Tony was a great man to talk. I wondered aloud if he would ever get the answers to the questions that he needed answers to in his lifetime. He didn't need to reply. He knew it, and I knew it too.

For all that life had thrown at him, Tony was a man of great humour and his energy was boundless.

Having reported his stories for a number of years, ours was a relationship that got off to a poor start - he stood me up. Tony was in Charlestown talking to a friend, probably Mickey Dunleavy from his wrestling days in the UK, while I sat waiting in Swinford, none too impressed. I learned later that Tony liked to talk.

A rearranged date followed and you couldn't help but being taken in by his energy and warmth.

Tony could talk for hours, about his life, his time as a wrestler in the UK, and his work for other survivors on his return to Ireland. But it wasn’t all about himself. He liked to hear your stories too.

Having been born in Manchester myself, I was a Big Daddy fan over there at the time Tony was on the wrestling scene. I apologised for not knowing about him but being under five, my life experience was limited.

Tony's life has been made into a film, and it's little wonder. Taken from his mother, attending her funeral and not knowing whose it actually was, sent to various institutions and on wild goose chases in his quest for answers just part of the story.

However, he did find his family and he was taken into their embrace. He had in his possession a treasured photo of his mother early in her pregnancy. He received his first birthday card for a brother on his 73rd birthday, a card he treasured.

There is sadness that Tony died alone. However, his memory will be treasured in the hearts of all those he touched on his life's journey.

Tony was laid to rest in Dublin.

D.K.